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Women Have to Be Protected and Respected, Part 1 of 8

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The Blessed Prophet Muhammad, Peace Be Upon Him, and the Koran have never taught us to pillage other people’s property – even if you think girls are property! – nor force women into any thing or any relationship against their will, so any Muslim engaged in any kind of activity contrary to this established teaching is betraying the Koran and the great Prophet’s teaching.

“Interviewer(m): When you see in certain parts of the country where the Taliban has exercised a lot of control, we see reports of people who are activists or former members of the government, they’re disappearing, ending up dead. If this is a harbinger of what’s to come, then the Taliban 2.0 may not be what we think it is. It may even be worse than what it was before.”

“Reporter(m): In some areas, they banned girls going to school beyond the age of 12. (The Taliban talks a lot about how it’s changed, and girls can go to school now. But I asked if any of these girls would be going to school, and I was told, ‘Absolutely not. Girls don’t go to school.’ And when I said why don’t girls go to school, they said, ‘Taliban says it’s bad.’) (Next to the mosque, we find a classroom of young girls. But their teacher says they will only receive religious education and will not attend regular school.)”

“Woman(f): We were living in Herat and we escaped from Herat and came to Kabul city to save our lives, because also my uncle has worked with the Taliban, and they want to oblige us into forced marriage. And so I’m a doctor, and my sister was working with women’s rights. She studied law. And also, my mother is a teacher. My mother was a teacher of students in 8th class, boys. The Taliban don’t let her teach the boys. I’m too sure that they will kill us.”

“Reporter(f): Afghanistan is one of the deadliest places in the world, to be born a woman. (I have never, never felt it to this extent, helpless, hopeless, disappointed, poor and miserable in my life.) (Our friends are going to get killed. They’re going to kill us. Our women are not going to have any more rights.) (Women have allegedly been tortured for venturing out of their homes alone, singing, having romantic relationships, and for not covering their faces.)”

“Roya Sharifi: There are no young or old women in Herat, this is not a good situation, and even women who work in government offices do not go to work. (In the areas that the Taliban rules, there are simple rules for women: - women should cover themselves from head to toe; - women are forbidden from walking outside the house; - they should leave home only with a male relative; - there are restrictions on girls’ education. Despite its claims of being a new Taliban, all of this is reminiscent of the dark period.)”

“Reporter(m): This is an emergency now. It’s nothing to do with process. They’re just trying to save lives. (Sit down.) (Tens of thousands are trying to get through at the front, they’re being crushed. Paratroopers pulling people from the mayhem.)”

(Master, what makes the Afghan women so afraid of the Taliban?)

Oh, yes. You should do some research into what the Taliban’s doing to the women all these decades, and then you’ll understand. (OK.) It is not just about being married away to anybody that they have no choice. But it’s about all kinds of things; the women’s rights, women’s dignity, women’s choice.

They are human beings; they are children of God. (Yes.) They cannot be forced, they should not, they must not be forced into any kind of situation that is degrading to their womanhood and motherhood. According to all the reports, they force the women from a young age to middle age, to marry their own soldiers or fighters without their consent. (Yes.) And in the world, if a man forces a woman into this kind of physical relationship, then they are going to jail. (Right.) Because it’s like a sexual assault. Like raping. (Yes, Master.) So, the Taliban is forcing women to go into a relationship with somebody she doesn’t even know, she doesn’t like, she doesn’t love, she has not the same ideal. (Yes, Master.)

The Blessed Prophet Muhammad, Peace Be Upon Him, and the Koran have never taught us to pillage other people’s property – even if you think girls are property! – nor force women into any thing or any relationship against their will, so any Muslim engaged in any kind of activity contrary to this established teaching is betraying the Koran and the great Prophet’s teaching. They should be punished according to Islamic law, not the gentle, innocent faithfuls in the woman form!!! May Allah protect the women, to whom the Holy Koran granted all freedom and respect!

And normally the Taliban emphasizes the ideal; you have to live with an ideal, you fight for your idealism. But like this, they don’t give women any ideal. The women, they have their own ideal. (Yes. Of course.) So, they’re forcing somebody into their own ideal which sooner or later might explode. You never know.

Because women, they have their own dreams, their own ideals, they want to lead a normal life and normal family, where they can take care of their children with a loving husband. (Yes.) Not just anybody who comes into her life and tears her life apart just for sex, and then breeding more of the oppressed girls’ generation and or the boys will be going out to war anywhere again and dying anywhere without the mother having anything to say. (Right. Yes.) You see what I am saying? (Yes, Master.)

And that’s what they are more afraid of. Not just for their lives. Even they don’t care about their lives, they say they’d rather die than go with the Taliban. And this is not right, not correct. If the Taliban has ideals, then they should think about this. (Yes.) Everyone has their own ideal as long as it’s no harm to anyone else. (Right.)

The women, they just want to have a normal life, some education so they can contribute to the society and educate their children in the right way. (Yes, of course.) Like this a forced physical relationship will not make a good society at all. Because it will breed countless unhappy women. And unhappy women make unhappy marriages. Unhappy marriages contribute to an unhappy society. I don’t know how any leader or any government would like to lead or to govern such an unhappy, stressed-out society, lamenting inside out like that. (Yes. That’s true.) And that’s not a good policy. (No, no.) They will not be successful governing a whole country full of sorrow. (Yes.) Full of sorrow and unhappiness from inside the family already.

If a woman is not happy, she’s not going to make her husband happy. Forced or not. Because a loveless marriage, an oppressive marriage is no marriage at all. It’s like slavery. (Exactly.) We are in the 21st century already; we don’t have this type of thing. (Yes.) We should not. (Yes.) It’s too backward, too uncivilized, too barbarous to treat a human, a woman with dignity, like that. So, they are scared. Not just that, but it’s against their will, against their ideal, against anything that they are dreaming of or thinking of. (Right. Yes.) Suppose the man reversed their situation, reversed their positions, and became a woman and was forced into this kind of situation, what would he feel? (Yes.) If the Taliban leader was forced to become a woman and just pushed into anybody else’s bed and then do that kind of sexual thing without their consent, what would the leader of the Taliban feel? Do you understand what I’m saying? (Yes, understand, Master.) They should do things with more consideration, more intelligence, more feeling toward the others, not just themselves. Any government should do that. (Yes, Master.)

Another thing is, the women have nothing to say in their future. They worry that if they give children again into that relationship, then the girl will be oppressed with no education, become like a dummy in the society, and the boy will be brainwashed to go out and fight, and die. (Yes, it’s just terrible.) Or live in such a society, where nobody’s happy.

You know very well. (Yes.) If the wife’s not happy, the husband will not be happy, the children will not be happy. (It’s true.) And this conflicting energy in the family will breed more conflict in the society. I don’t know if anybody will continue to govern like that for long. It’s logical. (Yes, absolutely.) You don’t have to be religious (No.) or big brain to understand this. (Yes.) So, the women, they are wiser, they understand all these consequences as well. So they cannot cooperate with this kind of arrangement. Not just because of being scared but it’s not possible for them to accept it. It’s not possible for the world to accept this, as well. (Yes. No way.) No way! No way.

Long ago, we had this kind of system, like marriage by arrangement. (Right.) But we don’t have that anymore. (No.) It was difficult because in those times, women cannot get out of the house. A man cannot see any girls, so he had to rely on the matchmaker. (Right.) But with the consent. (Yes.) The matchmaker brings the boy to the house, and then introduced to the family first, and then they observe them, they ask them for all kinds of details. (Yes, yes.) Like in India before, details like what kind of education he has. (Yes.) How much can he earn, can he provide for the family? Can he provide for his wife? Future wife. (Yes, I see.) And how is his behavior? Is he drinking, or is he gambling? Is he a good boy or not? (Yes.) And then, the boy’s family also asked about the girl. What’s her habit? What is her favorite… What’s the family background also! (Yes, yes.) Whether or not they are in balance with each other. (Yes.)

The same in China, Âu Lạc (Vietnam) before. They checked very well. They checked even horoscopes, they checked everything. (Right.) And with the consent of the girls and the boys. (Yes.) Then they marry. (They’re not forced this way. No way.) They are not forced to do it blindly, blindfolded, and into an ideology of violence or war that they don’t want.

Women, we want peace. (Yes.) To think the boy has to be raised up and then be another warrior and go out killing again – of course, no mother would like that. (No.) No future mother would like that. No girls would ever dream of a family like that. (No.) That girls would be oppressed without any education at all, and boys go out to be… whatever they name it. (Yes, Master.) And die, horribly, and bring many people to die with him, something like that. That, no woman can accept. No mother would like her son to be one like that. (No.) So that’s why they are afraid of everything. It’s not just about the Taliban. It’s the idea (I see.) behind all that. You got what I’m saying? (Yes, Master.)

This world is hell. I’m telling you. The world is going under already. I mean going and going. And they’re still fighting with each other, and doing all this kind of violent stuff, or competing or snatching each other’s power and land and forcing even their own citizens into situations that they don’t want. I don’t know how any government would ever govern such a country full of hateful citizens and rebellious inside or outside citizens, and unhappy, discontented citizens. (Yes. Cannot imagine.) Cannot! Half of any country, or most of the world are women. Half of it. Half of the country unhappy, that makes another half also unhappy. (Yes.) How will any country survive and prosper? Tell me. (And affects the whole world.) So now you know why. (Yes, Master. Thank You.)

There is a group. They call them Boko Haram. And he often with his troops goes to schools and kidnaps the girls. And then he said he will marry them to his group’s males. Just as they had forced his mother to marry before. (I see.) His mother was forced to marry some man she didn’t like, of course. And then, probably she was unhappy and told him all this unhappiness in her forced marriage. (I see.) So he said he kidnapped all these girls and force them to marry his troops, just like his mother was forced to marry before. And when he was announcing that, I saw it on TV, he had a sense of sadness. (I see.) Sadness. (Right.) I think it was because of the influence of his mother’s sadness. He said he probably wants to revenge for his mother, so people would feel how she feels. So the circle will go on forever like that. (Yes.) And this will never be well. (Right.)

Anything being coerced, forced, or oppressed, or threatened into cooperation will never go well. (Yes. It’s true.) Besides, you see we are in the 21st century, women became astronauts, go into space. Women are in the scientific field. (Yes.) Women have invented many things that are beneficial to human beings, animals, and the whole world. (Yes, yes.) And women have become prime ministers, presidents, and leading the world into prosperity. At least their nation. Of course, the world will benefit as well. (Right.)

So, the Afghan women cannot be contented just to stay home and scrub the floor, and always “aye aye, sir.” (Yes.) Even though she has better ideas, she has more intelligence even. (Yes.) Possible that many women have more intelligence than some men. That’s for sure. So, how can? How can any country go forward in that kind of energy, in that kind of situation, that kind of very unhappy atmosphere? (Yes, understand.) Women, they are wise. (They are.) They understand all that. They can see far in the future. It’s not just about themselves that they worry about. (Yes.) They worry about their country, (Yes.) their children, the future of their children. (Right.) OK. Anything else?

(Yes. I was wondering, so, is then the Western society system better or the Taliban one?) You mean in general or for women? (For women.) OK. Of course, both systems have flaws. Have good and bad. (Yes.)

In the Western society, women are free. (Yes.) In the free countries, women are free to do… Even in communist countries, they are free to go for education, to go for the sports, to go for scientific discovery and invention. Women can do many things, and women became leaders of the country. Even in China, they have a woman as a vice prime minister or vice president. Anyway, a top leader. (Right.) One of the top leaders. Even that. And in Âu Lạc (Vietnam), we also have women in the top leading roles. (Yes, Master.) Even in, for example, a so-called communist country. (Yes.) In North Korea, women also take a leading role, for example like that. (Yes.)

So, I don’t see why in the Islamic countries, women should be oppressed. (There’s no reason at all.) No good at all. In some of the Islamic countries, women are more free, they can go to school and all that. Which is good, but it’s not as free as in the Western countries, Western system, for women. (Yes. Right.)

In the Western countries, women are more respected. (Yes.) Almost everywhere are more respected. Like men, equal. They have same jobs. Same salary. Same ambition. Same positions. They can do what they want, provided they have the ability to give. (Yes. True.) But then, we, I mean the Western people, take the freedom too much for granted, too much over the border, (I see.) and forget that they should keep also their own femininity.

For example, something I do not like about Western society is that the girls, they are wearing too short, and baring too much skin. (Yes. I see.) They are flaunting too much of their assets. Baring too much. (Understand. Right.) That may be supposed to be sexy and provocative, but that also, in turn, a lot of times brings disaster for the girl. (Yes. I agree, that’s true.) They provoke the men’s hormones and then make them crazy, and then they will go after them and doing like sexual assault, or rape them, and then sometimes kill them, and that’s not good for the girl at all. (Yes.)

Knowing, it’s scientifically indicated that men already have trouble controlling their hormones. (Yes.) That’s why most of them have to marry. Fine, it’s good. But some men are not in a married situation and their hormones are still there, stacking up. So if a woman is more provocative like that, like baring it out and make the man feel even more provoked, their hormones are more raging, stacking up, rising up. (Right.) Then that’s not fair for the man also. (I see. Yes.) So in society we have many cases of sexual abuse, or rape or related deaths. (Right, they are.) Even within family, that’s no good.

I think in the family, parents should teach the children, especially girls, to wear more modestly, more decently. (Yes.) So not to invite trouble. (Right.) If you don’t wear decently and cover yourself more, of course the men or the boys like to look at you, and you feel more proud. But that is not without risk. And also they look at you in a sexually desirous way. It’s not respectful and not love. (Yes, Master.)

Love is different from sex. (Yes.) To love a woman and tenderly have a relationship with her is different than wanting her sexually only. (Yes, it is.) So the women should also keep their own dignity and decency, (Right.) so that she earns respect, and then when she meets a man, he will love her only because of love. (Right.) And sex comes as a second side effect. (Yes.) But not to come in because of sex. Because she looks sexy, because she bares all. (Yes.) And like flaunting her assets out, so to invite the man to like her, also inviting trouble. (Understand.) In some cases. (Yes, Master.)

Our society should be free, but freedom should be handled with wisdom. (Yes, that’s right.) A woman should be wise enough to protect her own dignity and decency. You have to earn respect from a man before you marry him. (Yes.) It’s better that way; the relationship will be happier and last longer. (Yes.) Because even if you wear sexy clothes and you entice a man for then, then he’s blind and then he marries you, but there are many more sexy girls around, everywhere. (Yes.) And maybe one day you’ll lose, because the relationship is not based on love and respect. (Exactly. Yes.)

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