For example, someone wrote a letter and said, “Why do You call Yourself a living Buddha? Didn’t You see what Your disciples have written?” For example like that. Then I’d be shocked, “Huh? Yeah, they wrote it, and I saw it.” I was shocked and checked myself, “Oh, it turns out to be like that.” I really am very shy and don’t like it that way. I couldn’t say that I didn’t see it. Of course, the way I see things is different. I see as if I didn’t see. That’s why I can endure people’s slander. Because praises also mean nothing. They both taste the same, but… it really makes me feel very embarrassed. I cannot stand up and say, “Hey! Look, I’m a Buddha.” Even if I don’t say it myself, the disciples would still say it. No? Sending my disciples out and then writing a bunch of advertisements. It’s just like advertising myself. If I don’t proclaim it, then I can only say, there’s an ordinary Buddhist nun coming to give a lecture. Who will come to listen? People will worry that you may come to ask for alms. Most monks go out to ask for donation to build temples and to beg for alms or whatever. Before the lecture begins, they already put a donation box outside the lecture hall. Once you take refuge in Buddhism, you have to offer red envelopes or whatnot. People are very scared.
Sometimes, you see when most ordinary monks give lectures, how many people will go to listen? Very few, no? Mostly, if lots of people come, it is because they have already proclaimed that the lecturer is a living Buddha, etc. Is that right? That’s why people come. If I also go out like that, claiming that I’m a living Buddha or any Buddha, never mind, it’s such an embarrassing thing. That’s why I don’t want to give lectures. I don’t want to do all those things in public. I’m truly very shy. But if we don’t say anything, people won’t listen and won’t understand. Yes or no? (Yes.) Then, if you say it publicly, people would say that we’re advertising. Nothing is right. Once we advertise, people are already suspicious. (Understand.) If we don’t advertise, people are even more suspicious, saying, “Who does She think She is? Why should I go to Her lecture? Just a waste of time.” Too many. There’re too many monks or ordinary people claiming to be spiritual practitioners. “They are only cheating us. It’s meaningless. Don’t go again.” If we say, “This one is special, a living Buddha or such-and-such Buddha,” then people say that we’re advertising. They already become suspicious. Then they come and look at the hair and the shoes, the clothes. And then forget what I actually said. So it’s useless.
If I shave my head, then the Catholics won’t come to listen; if I wear a pastor’s clothes, the Buddhists will all leave me. If I have long hair, they say, “A nun returning to secular life. What kind of practice is that?” No matter what I do, it’s always “wrong.” If I wear jeans to go on stage, they would say, “What kind of spiritual practitioner is that? No, She is not!” If you don’t believe it, just put a picture of me wearing jeans, or a miniskirt – just like you, wearing a skirt – then you’ll put my full body photo all over the street, saying, “A lecture by Supreme Master Ching Hai,” let’s see who will come! When I went swimming with you, I wore something that showed a tiny bit of my back; it already caused a sensation. Next time I’ll go out wearing a miniskirt. Yeah, going swimming but not even being allowed to wear a swimsuit. This world is so absurd. You ask me to go out, and show myself to everyone, letting people look at me with those kinds of eyes. For what? Sometimes even our own initiates are weak in faith, not to mention people outside who don’t understand me at all.
It’s difficult to find a sincere Master. I’ve told you already. Really, when I was living there, my heart was absolutely still; I never wanted to come down. If you don’t believe me, go and see for yourselves. Living in such a tranquil place, my mind was empty. The word “suffering” never came to my mind. How would I understand other’s suffering. I wouldn’t understand. At that time, I just thought, “Nothing is happening in the world.” Really, it’s amazing. If any of you are not practicing well, when you have time, bring some dried food, rice, something simple, and several warm outfits, and a tent, find a quiet place, and practice spiritually for a few weeks, then you’ll be different. Bring some books if you want, some good scriptures. Bring my books if you want. Read some scriptures and then meditate. Cook for yourself. Swim a little and take a walk, then come back to meditate again. Detach yourself from vexations. Then you’ll know how much greed, anger and ignorance in you is reduced. Your sexual desire will also change, disappear.
Why do you have so many struggles? It has to do with situations. Therefore, don’t always blame yourself too much. It’s just the difference in circumstances. Therefore, from my point of view, no one is bad, no one is good. It’s just the circumstances. Sometimes, for example, a monk or male laymen are both the same. If you are quietly alone, there’s no problem if you don’t see a woman. But if you see one, it’s different. Seeing only, not even getting close or shaking hands or feet or anything. (Yes.) Is it not so? (Yes.) Therefore, you see, in the military or in prisons, men and women are separated strictly. The same with monks and nuns. It’s been like that ever since ancient times. Therefore, that’s why in the past Sakyamuni Buddha dared not accept females. He’s not worrying about Himself. He just understood the power of this chemical reaction. Two bodies of Ying and Yang are different. There’s bound to be a chemical reaction, there’s a reaction whenever the two get closer. It’s just like that, not that there’s a problem with any of them, or you really need and love that kind of thing. You may not enjoy it. Sometimes you even find it disgusting, but you can’t resist or control it. (Yes.)
The same with eating. If you stay away from the kitchen, you won’t feel anything. But if you hang around in the kitchen and see the food, you’d definitely want to eat. If you stay at home, you won’t feel you need to buy this and that. (Yes.) And once you enter the mall, it seems that you need everything. If not for today, tomorrow you’ll surely need it. So just buy it and leave it at home, to use it when you need it. Right? Kind of strange. The TV ads are very expensive, they charge by the second, not by minutes, but by seconds. (Yes.) Because the ads work. Sometimes you don’t even want to eat that thing, but after watching TV every day, and it keeps saying, “Yum, yum, yum. This chocolate is the most delicious!” Then one day you yourself also go, “Yum, yum.” You buy it and take a bite. When you find it not delicious, you say, “Oh, it’s a lie!” But you still bit it, you were cheated. If each person is cheated, how many people in the world would be cheated? Do you know? It’s a lot. Every day people take turns to be cheated. Then their business booms. How many people watch TV every day. How many people say, “Yum, yum.” We are all affected.
So, if some people think that there’s no big progress in their spiritual practice, then find a place for group meditation. A quiet place, especially for spiritual practice. When everyone has the same ideal, it’s better. Or find a quiet place if you have time, and practice by yourself, or with a partner. If you have two people, then keep a distance and cook separately. Because when you get together, you “Blah blah.” After time passes by, you get to realize, “Oh! We haven’t meditated today.” Time passes very slowly during meditation, and time passes so quickly when chatting. How strange! That’s why it’s so troublesome. (Yes.)
I’ve told you this secret tip, and many other tips. If you don’t do them accordingly, you’ll have more problems. When such desires emerge and you cannot control it, ask yourself, “Who is the one who needs it?” “Why do I need it?” It’s not asking yourself; it’s really digging in to check! Check the person. And then later it’ll be gone. No one needs it. It’s just habit. That’s how it is.
So, there are many aspects in spiritual practice, including almsgiving, keeping precepts, enduring humiliation, diligent practice, meditation, and wisdom. But, if we have the blessing of Buddhas and Bodhisattvas, that is the most important. We alone really cannot climb up. I truly realize this deeply. I’m not threatening you. Of course you have to rely on yourself in spiritual practice. What does “relying on yourself” mean? We have to be sincere. We should be diligent and make effort. We should remember our inner self at all times, the Buddha Power within. That’s how it is. But we have to sincerely ask for Hiers help any time. That is what we call God or Buddha, the Real Self, which we all have inside us. But if we think that we alone can practice spiritually, it’s still the mind, it’s still our ego which is doing. That’s why we can’t do it. Sometimes we think that if we keep precepts very clearly, we can achieve many things. No, no, no, no. Sometimes we think that if we meditate a lot, a lot, struggling with great effort, then we’ll get something. No! It’s not like that either. Today… I’ve forgotten what I was going to say. When we get it, we get it. When we cannot get it, we can’t get it.
We can’t tell who’s good, who is practicing seriously, and who is not. It’s the utmost sincerity inside, which is invisible to people outside. We also can’t measure our sincerity with our mind. No. If we’re truly sincere, we’ll connect with our Real Self. It will be sincere naturally. It means if your Real Self is sincere, it will come out by Itself, and when it’s time, It’ll go Home. Only then can we say that we get Buddha’s Blessing or God’s Grace. Otherwise, we really can’t say how good we are.
I’ve read stories of many spiritual practitioners. Some practice like this, and others like that. All attained the Tao. Like when I was in India, I encountered many so-called enlightened masters, who claimed that they should earn their own living, to avoid incurring karma. So that they can attain the Tao, the great enlightenment. And then I saw some people became renunciates, not earning money nor doing any good thing, always walking around, seeing this person and visiting this and other people, and then practiced by themselves, and attained the same thing. Then we cannot say what is what. Strange enough! Some people practice extreme asceticism, very strict, drinking only (vegan) milk, sometimes drinking only (vegan) milk for many days. Sometimes they fast for ten days, more than 10 days, or even 20 days. It all happens. Sometimes they eat only one meal a day. It also happens. Or they go to a very quiet place to practice spiritually, alone in the cold, wearing nothing even in severe cold weather, meaning without a quilt.
There was a renunciate, who was said to have reached Buddhahood because someone also saw his light body, and that his body glowed, meaning he could be considered as an enlightened person. There was proof. As a renunciate, he had a wife and a child before. He didn’t have money at home; he just renounced everything and left, completely ignoring everything. He didn’t care that his family had no money; he just left. After becoming a renunciate, he went to visit this and that teacher and practiced spiritually. He practiced the method of chanting mantras which was imparted by an enlightened Master. He didn’t learn to chant by himself, which is useless. It’s really like that. Sometimes he drank only and sometimes fasted for weeks, sitting in a cave alone, where there’s no shelter. When it was raining and windy, it’s cold and wet. Completely wet, he still sat there day and night, not moving, not bothered. Sometimes it was really hot. He had no shoes on and walked barefoot on the roads in India during the scorching summer. If you don’t wear shoes, the ground would burn your feet, and your feet would get blisters… lots of them! I know – I’ve been there.
Photo Caption: Stay in ‘n Take Care of the Present; Past ‘n Future Are Not Here!
